You know how sometimes you may be about ready to give up and someone gives you a word of encouragement that keeps you going? A big Thank You to whoever wrote the post about the Daily PlanIt at Lifehack.org! Now the pressure is really on to keep coming up with ideas! I’m reminded of the moment in the movie “Joy Luck Club” when the mother tells the daughter, “I see you.” That’s an important part of love, to really see and be seen. I feel loved today!
I guess it’s time to come forth and share a little more information about me. I’ll start with some of the hard stuff first. I’m an adult child of an alcoholic, with somewhat predictable results that are pretty ingrained. Like difficulty with boundaries, and the unspoken rule of “Don’t talk about it.” Another result is co-dependency, a learned pattern of self-defeating coping behaviors. Coping.org has lots of information for those who are struggling with these problems. When we fail to understand what we control, we often have dysfunctional relationships with ourselves and others. From various sources I’ve learned there are basically three things we control: our own thoughts, feelings, and actions. More on this later.
That said, it’s probably not too surprising that I went through a divorce some years ago that rocked my world. I’m not saying that he didn’t have his own issues too! 🙂 I’ve searched for answers as I’ve struggled with these problems. I know I’m not alone. And if you have problems too (and if you’re human you just might), you’re not alone either.
I’m encouraged when Dr. Phil McGraw says that we do not have to be defined by our past. That leads us back to change, and it ain’t easy. But is the alternative working for you? A definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. But so many times we keep trying anyway, because we don’t know any other way to do it. That’s why Steve Pavlina is so helpful as he focuses on awareness and choosing love over fear.
You know how sometimes you just happen on to the thing that you need to see or hear? When I was cruising at Lifehack.org I discovered Phil Gerbyshak’s Make It Great site and he’s an incredibly positive person with awesome things to say! Now I need to re-title my article Top
Ten Eleven Time and Life Management Blogs. 🙂 Then I turned on the tv to begin my exercises and Robert Schuller was talking about the five R’s of love. My hope is that you can find something that you need to see or hear on The Daily PlanIt.