In the movie “Yes, man,” Jim Carrey’s character decides to say yes to everything, and it leads to some amusing situations. Sometimes saying yes to opportunities can lead to expanding your comfort zone and some pretty amazing things. However, saying yes to everything does not always work out well!
When we say yes to one thing, we are saying no to other things. Our time and energy are limited resources, and we simply can’t do it all. Choose wisely to say yes to what matters most. A TED article by author Ryan Holiday reminds us that every “yes” to one thing is a “no” to something else. Watch his TED talk (20:37) and read more about the angst guide to motivation.
So how do we decide whether to say yes or no to something?
Take NOTE:
- Notice the request and ask questions for clarity.
- Offer appreciation “thanks for thinking of me”
- Take time “I’ll think it over and get back to you tomorrow”
- Examine options – take STOCK
Take STOCK – does this fit?
- Strengths and abilities
- Time and energy
- Other VIP AIMS: very important pursuits that are Active, Inspiring, Meaningful Solutions
- Commitments and obligations
- Key values
ASK: Will saying yes to this mean saying no to another priority? Will it take away from something else that is important? Will it over-extend you? An article at Fast Company provides three questions to ask yourself before saying yes or no to anything.
Photo by Donald Tong on Pexels.com
Say YES to:
- Your top priorities based on values, practices that contribute to happiness and well-being.
- Exciting opportunities that offer BIG impact and HIGH engagement.
- Support activities for goals that AIM for a vision.
Say No To:
- PASS on requests that don’t fit your priorities, abilities, strengths, or schedule.
- Activities that provide low returns or NO returns! those that…
- Sap your energy and suck up too much time, or are…
- Simply stupid time wasters and distractions.
If your decision is no, communicate clearly and respectfully:
- Not now or never
- Offer alternatives – other ways or someone else
- Politely decline
- Explain reasons
Some possible responses:
- “I have other plans.”
- “My schedule just won’t permit it.”
- “I have too many other commitments.”
Once a decision has been made, it is Time to Act! Read more at How to Say No from Lifehack.org, Practice Saying No from Christine Carter, and 20 ways to say no at onlineorganizing.
I seek to create order from the chaos of complex information. Join me at the Daily PlanIt to gain insights, inspiration, and information to increase skills for a better life. I unlock the power of teaching reading with phonics in the pursuit of literacy at www.phonicspow.com. In my spare time I explore books and movies, often choosing titles available on both screen and page.
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