What We Control

Many problems result when we attempt to control that which is outside of our control.

Which of these things do you think is within your control?

  • Thoughts
  • Where we were born
  • Actions
  • Race
  • Values
  • Age
  • Education
  • Intelligence
  • Feelings
  • Birth family
  • Wellness
  • Health
  • Ourselves
  • Physical attributes
  • Others
  • Weather
  • Traffic

There are three things we control-our own:

  • thoughts
  • feelings
  • actions

In Rational Emotive Therapy Albert Ellis shows how our feelings come from the thoughts we think. Learn your emotional ABCs (pdf) or use this Worksheet.

Although we do not control others that does not mean that we are powerless.

Through what we say and do we may choose to:

  • Share information
  • Express our opinion
  • Ask for what we want
  • Pray
  • Influence
  • Persuade
  • Set limits
  • Recognize what is and is not love

Base your intentions on love. Adversity happens. It doesn’t build character, it reveals it. This doesn’t mean we can’t set goals and work towards them. It does mean that we have to accept that there will be unexpected obstacles in life that can affect our outcomes. The alternative is to drift aimlessly without making any attempt to shape your life.

This is one of the weekly activities for a Year of Personal Development.

I write about goal setting, time management, and other skills for personal development, happiness, and a productive life. My fascination with phonics and the pursuit of literacy is shared at www.phonicspow.com. I enjoy reading books and watching movies based on the screen and page method.

Posted in personal development
2 comments on “What We Control
  1. […] Understand what you can change and what you can’t […]

  2. […] reading inspirational works-seeking comfort and strength wherever you may have found it. Remember what you can change, and what you can’t, and even though we cannot make others think or do what we might want, you can speak up, persuade, […]

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