Creating Clarity

A life lived on autopilot defeats intentional choices. Research shows that around 43% of our  behavior is habitual, which can be problematic at times. Routines can be beneficial for productivity. But it can be all too easy to slip into an unexamined life and a lack of awareness. Based on data collected by organizational psychologist Tasha Eurich, a whopping 95 percent of people believe they’re self-aware—yet only 10-15 percent actually are. Self awareness and awareness of others are both important to enhance personal growth and improve relationships, and mindfulness is a practice that increases happiness. To gain clarity and make the unconscious conscious takes increasing observational skills and noticing the inner self and the outer world of our surroundings.

SELF AWARENESS begins with knowing yourself well: your values and purpose, interests and personality, talents and strengths, aspirations and goals, life mission and vision. [start at Discover U in Ten Steps] In the present moment, notice what you are feeling physically and emotionally, what you are thinking, and what you are doing. Affiliate links to books at Amazon in the post below provide a small commission to help support the Daily PlanIt.

What are you feeling physically? What is your body telling you?
• Notice posture
• Observe hunger or thirst
• Tend to tension – stretch
• Examine energy levels
DISCOVER SENSES
• sight
• sound
• smell
• taste
• touch

➸ Strategies
• Mindful breathing
• Assess fitness and heart rate
• Perform a body scan
• Start meditation

What are you feeling emotionally? Do you feel pleasurable emotions? (needs are satisfied) or painful emotions? (needs are not satisfied)
DEVELOP EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
• Notice and Name
• Accept (ACT-Acceptance and commitment therapy) [Passengers on the bus exercise from Therapy in a Nutshell]
• Manage (DBT-Dialectical behavioral therapy)
• Express appropriately

ACT & DBT are Cognitive Behavioral Therapies (CBT) ACT: “The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Anxiety” by John Forsyth, TED talk Why it’s hard being human, Jonathan Bricker TED talk The Secret to self-control.

➸ Strategies
• Guided meditations like coping with uncertainty
• Urge surfing to manage the wave, understand that emotions are temporary
• Include resilience ↴
• Distress tolerance (DBT)
• Emotional regulation (DBT)

DBT: “How Emotions Are Made” by Lisa Feldman Barrett, TED talk You aren’t at the mercy of your emotions

RESILIENCE
• Reflect
• Reset
• Review
• Re-frame
• Redirect
• Reconnect

What are you thinking? Are your thoughts rational?
DIRECT Self Talk
• Deliberate distance
• Irrational to rational
• Re-frame
• Emotional congruence
• Coach not critic
• Try REBT (Rational emotive behavior therapy)

“Chatter” by Ethan Kross, TED talk Do you talk to yourself? Here’s how to harness your inner voice. “Above the Chatter” by Bruce Pulver, TED talk The secret to changing negative self-talk by renewing your mindset

➸ Strategies
• Include growth mindset
• Consider behavioral economics ↴
• Affirmations
• New beliefs

BEHAVIORAL ECONOMICS
• Cognitive biases
• Likely to leave defaults
• Averse to loss
• Present bias
• Set precommitment

REBT: Jennifer Willis TED talk What’s Your Frame?

What are you doing? Does what you do reflect your best self?
DEPLOY SOS to pause and shift
• Set intentions
• Observe behavior
• Shift back on course toward what matters

Tanner Clark TED talk One Second of Strength

➸ Strategies
• Be the person you want to be
• Establish habits for self-care  ↴
• Start with PLANS  ↴
• Take action

“Exceptional” by Dan Cable, TED talk Best self-activation seeking system

Establish habits with a daily routine to practice self-care
• Rest and relaxation
• Include exercise
• Stay hydrated
• Eat healthy foods

Reflect on PLANS for meaningful movement

• Pursue purpose
• Look at values
• Action steps
• Note measures
• Set priorities

OUTER AWARENESS
• Social impact of others
• Others perceptions of you
• Surroundings
OTHER AWARENESS What are others doing and saying?
↳ Actions
• behaviors
• expressions
• attention
• nonverbal cues
↳ Speech
• tone of voice
• ask opinions
• look
• listen actively

➸ Strategies
• Develop observational and communication skills
• Attend to body language
• Request feedback
• Turn off distractions
SURROUNDINGS What is going on around you?
NATURE
• Plants
• Animals
• Weather
• Seasons
NEWS
• community
• local news
• world events
• national news

➸ Strategies: Spend time outside, stay informed

Awareness is key for happiness, and for making the most of our time. See also A Mindful Moment and the Wheel of Awareness. More books and TED talks about awareness:

• “Yoga and the Pursuit of Happiness” by Sam Chase, TED talk Paying attention and mindfulness
• “Insight” by Tasha Eurich, TED talk Increase your awareness with one simple fix
• “Get Out of My Head” by Andrew McConnell, TED talks Rediscovering what truly matters and How to stop being a renter of your time and your mind
• “Peak Mind” by Amishi Jha, TED talk How to tame your wandering mind
• “The Magic of Mindful Self-Awareness” by Matt Tenney, TED talk Why the best leaders make love the top priority
• TED talk “Are you self-aware or just self-absorbed?” by Fin Sheridan
• TED talk “Awareness, assumptions, and actions – why you do what you do” by Steve Piscitelli
• Big Think Feel first, think second
• The Road to Clarity Starts With Confusion at Mindfulambition.net

Explore more TED talks by speakers who are also authors at TED Talk Book Discussion.

About dailyplanit

I seek to create order from the chaos of complex information. Join me at the Daily PlanIt to gain insights, inspiration, and information to increase skills for a better life. I unlock the power of teaching reading with phonics in the pursuit of literacy at www.phonicspow.com. In my spare time I explore books and movies, often choosing titles available on both screen and page.