Four Fantastic Tools For Focus

What we see depends on what we look at. What we look at depends on what we see. – the Daily PlanIt

Just as we can hear a sound without really listening, so too can we see something without really noticing. And it is the listening and noticing that improves life. This is the reason why focus is the key to so many things. The difficulty is that it can be hard to gain focus and to retain it when life is full of so many interruptions, notifications, and distractions.

Focus

Four ways to TEND to focus:

    • Tame external and internal distractions
    • Embrace values and end procrastination
    • Notice the feedback
    • Dedicate time to priorities and feel flow

Tame external and internal distractions

To maintain focus, train yourself to forget about distractions. External distractions and interruptions can be challenging, so Design Your Ideal Workspace to help with these. Turn off notifications, use headphones, and put out a do not disturb sign. Also be aware of your own favorite internal distractions and practice strategies to overcome procrastination and maintain motivation. Use discipline but also take breaks and get creative.

Embrace values and end procrastination

Find motivation by knowing what is most important to you. Choosing VIP AIMS that are active, inspiring, meaningful, and significant is easier when you follow your values. Start by mapping your values to find your guiding principles. Then learn how to create a value statement of what you do and why, which becomes a power tool for purpose by providing incredible focus as well as direction. Understand procrastination triggers and solutions.

Notice the feedback

If you can not measure it you can not improve it. – Lord Kelvin

Measures matter, so feel the feedback. We need to know how we are doing. It’s not fun if we don’t know we are getting somewhere. Feature your goals, keep them visual and visible, and review progress. The sweet spot is a place of high value and low effort, but some goals involve sacrifice and sometimes even pain. The Economy of Goals means that goals are more likely to be accomplished if the benefits outweigh the resources required to obtain it. End goals lead to a meaningful journey by providing intrinsic motivation.

Dedicate time to priorities and feel the flow

Find the time for top priorities. Block off peak time in your schedule to concentrate on what is most important. Becoming intensely involved in important work can lead to feeling the flow experience. To inspire flow, look for the right balance of challenge and skill. To prepare, take care of yourself with enough rest and a proper diet to be at your best. Follow a routine and run your day like an athlete to cue work flow. But also be curious and have the courage to explore new areas beyond your comfort zone.

TENDtoFocus

  • Forget about distractions
  • Follow values for motivation
  • Feel the feedback
  • Find time for priorities

Focus on results and benefits for motivation

Procrastination triggers can grab our attention and prevent us from accomplishing the important things we really want to get done. Focus on the results and benefits of completing tasks to gain motivation. Benefits of setting and achieving goals include reducing stress, developing self-esteem, and more.

Focus and the the 4 Ps of Positive Pscyhology Practices

Positive shift happens when we practice activities that have been shown to increase happiness and well-being. Focus on the benefits of the BEMEASURING building blocks. Focus is a thread that weaves through many of the practices shown to increase happiness. The building blocks of Pause all require the ability to focus attention.  The practice of meditation is a way to train attention, and to breathe deeply can assist in the process. Both require an inner focus, while the ability to notice and be mindful can mean an outer focus. To Power Up, it takes attention to uplift ourselves and others and to be grateful. For Purpose, we must keep our focus on chosen goals, and to be in flow is to be so focused that you lose all track of time. For People, it takes attention to cultivate relationships, to notice emotions, and to communicate well. The challenge can be knowing when to pause and shift.

Resources to manage and maintain focus: Amazon affiliate links to books provide a small commission that helps to support the Daily PlanIt.

Books and talks

More Resources

Learn more at A Mindful Moment, Challenge Yourself, Inspire Flow, and the Focus Pinterest board.

Explore more TED talks by speakers who are also authors at TED Talk Book Discussion.

Posted in positive shift, productivity

12 Gifts of Christmas

ChristmasGifts12

The following ideas (with some of my favorites) to celebrate the 12 gifts of Christmas can make the holiday meaningful:

1. family – share the holiday with laughter and games, watch “Little Women” or “The Family Stone”
2. friends – send Christmas cards & letters, plan a get-together or a party, watch “It’s a Wonderful Life” or “Elf”
3. love – light a red Christmas candle, watch “Love, Actually” or “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past”
4. joy – watch “a Christmas Story,” “National Lampoon Christmas,” or “The Man Who Invented Christmas,” read “A Christmas Carol” or “The Night before Christmas
5. hope – put up a nativity set, watch “A Charlie Brown Christmas” or “The Little Drummer Boy”
6. peace – attend a church service, listen to “Silent Night,” or “Peace on Earth” by Casting Crowns
7. presents – shop, give a gift to someone in need: donate to a food pantry, shelter, or cause of your choice. Watch “The Ultimate Gift” or “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas,” read “The Gift of the Magi” by O. Henry
8. sights – decorate a Christmas tree
9. lights – view Christmas lights and firelight
10. sounds – listen to Christmas music, go caroling or to a sing along
11. scents – plug in scented oil fragrances of pine, bayberry, or cinnamon to smell
12. tastes – eat peppermints, candy canes, peanut brittle, chocolate covered cherries. bake Christmas cookies, gingerbread, or red velvet cake

See also BAH: Barely Able to Handle the Holidays and 12 Ways to Give

Download The 12 Gifts of Christmas

Posted in positive shift

BAH – Barely Able to Handle the Holidays

BAH – Are you Barely Able to Handle the Holidays? Perhaps your family has made a choice to limit gift-giving and focus more on the true meaning of Christmas, or maybe you have experienced a loss. If so, a new approach the holidays may be needed.

BAH – the dreaded trio
When you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one, some days are especially difficult, and three of them are: Birthdays, Anniversaries, & Holidays. To turn the BAH of the coming holidays into Ho Ho Hope, try wrapping a package.

present

Plan for these days, prioritize, and practice self-care.
Acknowledge the loss and find ways to honor your loved one.
Choose new traditions, and connect with others who are grieving.
Keep it simple and as stress-free as possible.
Ask for help and any support that you need.
Give what you can to those in need and give yourself a special treat.
Express your feelings in a journal or create a piece of art.

Fill the gaps:
If this holiday is different than it’s been in the past, if there is an emptiness in your heart and under the tree, there are new ways to approach it.

As the holidays draw near…
Give a gift to someone in need: donate to a food pantry, shelter, or cause of your choice. Make cookies or muffins to give to neighbors.
Attend church, a concert, or an event.
Plan a get-together with a friend.
Share time by volunteering or spend time with someone who might be lonely.

Presence over Presents

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before! ‘Maybe Christmas,’ he thought, ‘doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas … perhaps … means a little bit more!’

christmas-tree-ga28dfbbdc_1280

Consider filling the gap under the tree with:

  • An advent calendar
  • A basket for cards that arrive to represent the gift of friends and family
  • A flameless candle to represent the gift of love
  • A beautiful scented oil diffuser to represent the sights and scents of the holiday
  • A new calendar to represent the gift of time
  • An ornament made from Christmas carol sheet music to represent the gift of music
  • A favorite book of cartoons or funny movie on dvd to represent the gift of laughter
  • Thank you notes to use in the coming year to represent the gift of gratitude

Fill the gap at gatherings when there are not gifts to open with fun activities. This may be as simple as singing carols or play a card or board game.

Other ideas:

  • Find your elf names and get a peppermint when you remember to use them.
  • Play games: Christmas candy pass or candy cane games. Christmas Taboo or Scattegories (scattegories-think of items that fit particular categories that start with random letters)
  • Christmas Conversation Bingo – take an m&m for each answer.
  • Use the colored m&ms to decorate a printed Christmas tree – The first person to fill their tree wins a small gift.

Find links to these activities at this Pinterest board.

Have a no-cost or low-cost gift exchange.

For a no cost gift exchange, have each person find, print, and put in an envelope to bring:

  • a new or favorite recipe
  • a joke or cartoon
  • a bookmark
  • a poem
  • a quote
  • a coloring page

Roll a die. If it is…
1. Everyone pass left
2. Trade with anyone
3. Everyone pass right
4. Choose 2 others to trade
5. Unwrap yours or choose someone else
6. Roll again to choose one of the things below to share

Share:
1. Favorite book you read this year
2. Favorite movie you saw this year
3. a Fav Christmas movie
4. a Fav Christmas song
5. a Fav Christmas candy
6. a Fav Christmas cookie

Ideas for a low cost gift exchange:

  • a Christmas ornament
  • a Christmas candle
  • a Christmas kitchen towel
  • Christmas candy (candy cane, peanut brittle, chocolate covered cherries, kisses, etc)
    something chocolate

peppermint-o

Holiday wishes for you:

  • enjoy-mint, amuse-mint & content-mint
  • encourage-mint, amaze-mint & refresh-mint
  • involve-mint, commit-mint & engage-mint

Download the ideas in this post as a printable pdf

Posted in positive shift

Grief Forward

A year ago, I was a happy person. I had a wonderful life, and was putting the final touches on a book about practices that contribute to happiness. But then in January of 2022, my world collapsed around me. The sudden loss of my dearly loved husband James, the most amazing person I’ve ever known, catapulted me into a degree of pain that only those who have suffered such a loss truly understand. When he passed away, I found myself on an unexpected journey of grief, struggles, stress, and anxiety like I’d never experienced before. I was as far from happiness as it is possible to get. Helping me along this difficult path were people who cared, and I am eternally grateful for them. I’m also grateful for writing about the twelve practice earlier, for they are also coping strategies that can help us through hard times. This year I have often felt barely alive, and the ability to take a breath, to take just one step, and to take just one day, one moment at a time, was all that was possible, and all that kept me going.

For those who grieve, I will share some quotes that have helped me below. Some of them are spiritual in nature, for spirituality is one of the practices. However you see God, I believe He is a presence and source of strength that is always there for you.

From “the Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz:
“God is life. God is life in action. The best way to say ‘I love you, God,’ is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, ‘Thank you, God,’ is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now. Whatever life takes away from you, let it go.”

But when the present frankly sucks in every possible way, the truth is that we don’t want to stay in that moment. To me, the awful present felt like it stretched into a very bleak future as far as I could see. It’s a very tough place to be. It is human nature to seek pleasure and avoid pain. When confronted with pain of this magnitude, nothing is more desirable than the sweetness of oblivion. I sought it in the nothingness of sleep, in watching a lot of mind-numbing television, and frequently in a tequila bottle paired with my favorite comfort food – BBQ potato chips. I had no wish at all to increase awareness, the foundational skill of happiness. In fact, I craved nothing so much as the exact opposite. I wanted only to numb the terrible pain of grief, and to avoid as much as possible all of the many problems and complications that avalanched down upon me. To stop thinking, to stop feeling, even to stop being. I knew this wasn’t really living, and certainly not in a way that expressed love for God. But I didn’t know how to make my way back to life.

Into this void, came a quote from the movie “First Reformed” – “Courage is the solution to despair.”

Courage is the way to move forward through grief. With courage we are brave enough to tell others what we need, to seek out resources that help, and to keep trying to learn how to live. With courage we are brave enough to feel the pain so that in time we can once again live fully. Courage is not easy, but it is the only way forward.

In “C.S. Lewis Onstage: the Most Reluctant Convert,” he says: ”For they (art and music) are not the thing itself; they are only the scent of a flower we have not found, the echo of a tune we have not heard, news from a country we have never yet visited.” Joy can be found in beauty, nature, art and music, learning, and travel to new places. Know that joy can still exist, and have the courage to look for it. God wants us to live, to not only survive but to thrive. He wants us to be happy. And there is no doubt at all that our loved ones want that for us too.

Prayers from the daily devotional “Amazing Grace” (given to me by my friend and neighbor Marcia, whose loving kindness has supported me every step of the way):
“God, teach me to have the courage to act in the world as you wish me to. Help me find a way to push through the challenges that arise in my path, and show me how to overcome evil with love and compassion. Help me to stand tall against fear and stay in the light.” – p. 346
“Dear God, I ask today for a bold new vision for my life. I ask for the strength and wisdom to be a better person to all those I come in contact with. I ask for the courage to step out of my comfort zone and expand my capacity for joy.” – p. 347

First and always, be kind. If you have lost someone you love, you have been gravely wounded. If you are grieving, be especially kind to yourself as you heal, and be aware of what you can handle and what you can’t yet. But also have the courage to move forward when you are ready. Grief changes everything. The world becomes a different place, and we become different people after being touched by grief. But good can still exist, and we can be part of it. For everyone, wherever you are, whatever you are facing, I hope the practices of positive shift help you as they have helped me. Learn more about them at Positive Shift Happens: the Excerpt. May we both keep moving forward toward peace and healing with courage.

Grief Awareness Week is December 2nd – 8

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Posted in positive shift

Press Play for an Appealing Brand Message

There are four steps for Marketing U – Discover, Define, Design, and Deliver. Step three is about designing marketing materials that reflect brand personality. This includes things like colors, fonts, and graphics, and also an appealing brand message.

AppealingBrandMessage

The following models can help to design a brand message that will capture attention and inspire interest.

The SUCCESs model from the book “Made to Stick” by Chip and Dan Heath:

Simple
Unexpected
Concrete
Credible
Emotional
Stories

The STEPPS model from the book “Contagious: Why Things Catch On” by Jonah Berger:

Social currency
Triggers
Emotion
Public
Practical
Stories

People are often drawn to things that are useful, outstanding, emotional, and surprising. Stories and emotion are included in both of these models. Stories are a powerful way to communicate and share a message that aims at the heart. As I looked for commonalities between these two models, I came up with PRESS.

For a brand message that captures attention, stand out with PRESS.

  • Practical – how is it useful?
  • Remarkable – how is it unique?
  • Emotional – how does it make you feel?
  • Surprising – how is it surprising?
  • Stories – how does it create change?

Another way to look at it is to SEARCH for appeal:

↳ Inspiring pursuits [see How to Choose VIP AIMS] are often:
Surprising
Emotional
Amusing
Rare
Clear
Helpful

The best messages are often memorable because they are Simple:

  • Nike – “just do it”
  • Walmart – “Save money. Live Better”
  • McDonald’s – “I’m lovin it”

Sally Hogshead, author of “Fascinate,” and TED talk speaker How to fascinate, suggests these fascination triggers: Power, Passion, Mystique, Prestige, Alarm, Vice, and Trust.

Play with archetypes to design an appealing brand message

There are 12 Jungian archetypes with some similarities to the 16 Myers-Briggs personality types. These personality models can be useful in designing a brand message and telling a story that appeals to motivational drivers for a target audience. Each of the archetypes have desires that they want.

JungianArchetypes

Leave a mark:
• the Hero,
• Rebel, and
• Magician want
↳ mastery
↳ revolution, and
↳ power

Structure:
• the Ruler,
• Caregiver, and
• Creator want
↳ control
↳ service, and
↳ innovation

Connection:
• the Lover,
• Everyman, and
• Jester want
↳ intimacy
↳ belonging, and
↳ enjoyment

Paradise:
• the Explorer,
• Sage, and
• Innocent want
↳ freedom
↳ understanding, and
↳ safety

Remember to press play and search for an appealing message to communicate and sell ideas to others.

Press Play to capture the attention of your target audience with an appealing brand message to start the next step: Design and Deliver a Delightful User Journey.

Posted in Ideas That Work

Characteristics of the 16 Myers-Briggs Personality Types

Myers-Briggs is a popular method to explore personality types. While it lacks in scientific validation, MBTI may be helpful in choosing careers, communication, understanding motivation, and even finding a good match to volunteer oppotunities by Myers-Briggs Type. This post provides an overview of characteristics of the 16 possible combinations of eight traits within four dichotomies.

The Myers-Briggs Personality Types are 16 combinations of 8 categories within 4 dichotomies:

  • Extrovert – Introvert. How you gain energy…from PEOPLE – E or from TIME ALONE – I
  • Judging – Perceiving. How you organize… with ORDER – J or FLEXIBILITY – P (see Task vs People Orientation below)
  • Thinking – Feeling. How you make decisions…guided by REASON – T or VALUES – F
  • Sensing – Intuition (N). How you view information…see DETAILS – S or POSSIBILITIES – N

MyersBriggsExpandedTable

THE QUADRANTS

Extroverts or Introverts. I chose to group these combinations in quadrants by first dividing all Extroverts on the left and all Introverts on the right, since this is the easiest to discern.

Task Orientation or People Orientation.* Next, the top two quadrants are Task Orientated and the bottom two quadrants are People Orientated. For the most part, those with a J designation tend to prefer structure and are task orientated, while those with a P designation tend to prefer flexibility and be people orientated. However, there are some exceptions. In the Extroverts, ESFJ is people orientated and ESTP is task orientated. In the Invtroverts, ISFJ is people orientated and ISTP is task orientated.

*https://www.myersbriggs.org/my-mbti-personality-type/mbti-basics/judging-or-perceiving.htm

CHARACTERISTICS OF THE 16 PERSONALITY TYPES*

ENTJ “Commander” bold, imaginative, determined leaders
ESTJ “Executive” (Director-VWM) frank, assertive traditional administrators and managers
ENFJ “Mediator” (Giver-VWM) charismatic, inspiring, supportive teachers
-ESFJ “Consul” (Caregiver-VWM) helpful, sociable, caring providers, people orientated

-ESTP “Entreprenuer” (Persuader-VWM) energetic perceptive communicators, detail & action orientated
ENTP “Debater” curious risk takers who love intellectual challenges
ESFP “Entertainer” (Performer-VWM) spontaneous, enthusiastic performers
ENFP “Campaigner” (Champion-VWM) sociable creative free spirits

INTJ “Architect” strategic thinkers and big picture planners
ISTJ “Logistician ” (Inspector-VWM) reliable, practical, fact minded analysts
INFJ “Advocate” active idealists, Both creative & analytical, emotional & logical
-ISFJ “Defender” perceptive guardians of rules who dislike change, people orientated

-ISTP “Virtuoso” (Crafter-VWM) self confident observant problem solvers, thoughtful adventure seekers, results orientated
INTP “Thinker-VWM” (Logician-16P) innovative inventors who love learning
ISFP “Adventurer” (Artist-VWM) charming, flexible, artistic explorers
INFP “Mediator” altruistic intuitive thinkers with purpose who see the big picture

*Names for the 16 personality types from https://www.16personalities.com/personality-types except INTP uses “Thinker” from VWM rather than Logician from 16P. In parentheses are different names from Very Well Minds, or VWM. https://www.verywellmind.com/the-myers-briggs-type-indicator-2795583#toc-the-mbti-types. Another approach to look at the different types is at https://www.truity.com/page/16-personality-types-myers-briggs.

Find your Myers-Briggs Personality Type: try an online test to determine your Myers-Briggs Personality Type.

Download a free two-page pdf with the Quadrants and Characteristics of the 16 Myers-Briggs Personality Types

See also information about archetypes at Press Play for an appealing brand message.

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Posted in personal development

Improve Communication with Myers-Briggs

The Myers-Briggs personality types are 16 combinations of 8 categories:

  • Extraversion or Introversion – how you gain energy (from people -or- time alone)
  • Judging or Perceiving – how you organize (with order -or- flexibility)
  • Thinking or Feeling – how you decide (with reason -or- values)
  • Sensing or Intution – how you view information (see details -or- possibilities)

Identifying personality types can help in finding a compelling career. It can also improve communication. An illustration from the Myers Briggs Company shows that each category has preferences for different kinds of communication. The article has a link to an interesting study on Myers-Briggs personality types and email too.

Communication and Myers-Briggs Personality Types

  • Extrovert – prefer lively group discussions
  • Introvert – prefer one-one discussions and time to think
  • Judging – be organized, give definite decisions
  • Perceiving – be open, give options
  • Thinking – be logical, explain reasons
  • Feeling – show empathy, describe effect on people & values
  • Sensing – be clear & direct, give facts, details, examples
  • Intuition – be imaginative, describe the vision

For example, as an INFJ I prefer one to one communication with time to think. I like organized information and definite decisions, imaginative language that describes the big picture and the effect on people and values. In each category there is a range with some stronger preferences along a spectrum, and there can be crossover among categories. I also enjoy lively group discussions, especially about ideas, and have an interest in details. It can always be helpful to ask. A key distinction is that extroverts tend to talk to think, and introverts think to talk.

 

Social Styles

Another way to look at how personality affects communication include Social Styles and Interaction Styles. Different models have various names for types, but they tend to be similar to the categories of Myers-Briggs types.

Learn more about communication with the Social Styles Model at bitesizelearning.co.uk . The names they use are: Driver | Analytical | Expressive | Amiable.

Interaction Styles

There are various names for categories in different Interaction Styles models. Explore these at the links below.

Head over to the Daily PlanIt Facebook page to comment!

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Posted in work skills

2022 Calendar to Make Positive Shift Happen

poster

Get ready to make positive shift happen in 2022! View the flipping pdf online, or a 2022 CD Calendar pdf version to download and print for information and inspiration on 12 index size cards that can be displayed in a CD case.

To add even more positive shift to 2022, read the online excerpt of “Positive Shift Happens: the power of a pause.”

Posted in positive shift

Positive Shift Happens: the excerpt

Many of the practices shown by research to increase happiness are simple, and most of them are not hard to do. But life is so busy and full of distractions that we often fail to fit the building blocks into our days. The solution is a framework to help us remember them, strategies to practice them, and the certain knowledge of benefits that result when we do so. The soon to be released book, “Positive Shift Happens: the power of a pause,” provides the tools to make a positive shift and practice the building blocks often.

The excerpt of the book is now available! Check it out If you want to learn:

• the BE MEASURING building blocks of positive shift
• the power of a pause with the SOS method
• the Four Ps of Positive Psychology: Power Up, Pause, People, and Purpose
• The four power tools: exercise, meditate, communicate, and follow values
• focus themes to include more positive shift

POSITIVE-SHIFT-HAPPENSCover2

Stay tuned for the upcoming release of the full book on Amazon. In chapters organized by the 4 Ps of Positive Psychology, you will learn:
• benefits of practices shown by research to increase happiness and well-being
• practical ways to implement the BE MEASURING building blocks
• exercises to develop strengths in each area
• productive time use, goal setting, and motivation strategies
• skills for relationships and communication

Positive shift happens – if you make it happen. The information in the book provides the tools to make a shift to a positive life and increased well-being. Many resources are already available at the Positive Shift Happens Toolkit. Now it’s all up to you!

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Posted in Books, personal development, positive shift

Scary Screen Reads

With Halloween around the corner, it’s time for horror stories. When it comes to movie adaptations based on books, there are a few available.

Scary

What’s New

From the King of Horror, Stephen King, there are lots of movie adaptations to choose from. Lisey’s Story is one of the latest, a mini-series on Apple TV+. There is an IMDB list of 50 more possibilities for Stephen King movie adaptations, with The Shining, Misery, and Carrie at the top!

Adam Nevill is a writer who is new to me, with two to choose from: The Ritual from 2017 is currently on Netflix, and No One Gets Out Alive is a new one.

There’s Someone Inside Your House is a new movie release coming to Netflix October 6th, based on the young adult novel by Stephanie Perkins. (a list of more young adult horror books here)

Did You Know?

Perhaps you know that The Exorcist is based on the book by William Peter Blatty. Did you know that Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho is based on a book by Robert Bloch? The Birds is based on a story by Daphne DuMaurier.

One of the scariest movies ever in my opinion, The Silence of the Lambs, is based on a book by Thomas Harris. Red Dragon and Hannibal are equally creepy.

Watch Interview with the Vampire, based on the book by Ann Rule.

Watch Bird Box, based on the book by Josh Malerman.

You is a Netflix series based on the book by Caroline Kepnes.

The Classics

Read Dracula by Bram Stoker at Gutenberg.org. Watch the 1931 classic movie with Bella Lugosi.

Read the ebook of Frankenstein by Mary Shelley at Gutenberg.org. Watch the 1931 classic movie with Boris Karloff.

Read The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe at Gutenberg.org. Watch The Raven (or the 1935 version with Boris Karloff and Bella Lugosi) and The Lighthouse based on stories by Edgar Allan Poe.

Read The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving at Gutenberg.org. The movie at IMDB.

How many scary screen reads have you read and/or watched? Try the List Challenge!

Posted in Books
eBooks

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